DENVER -- June 15, 2007

I was chewing on my Nylabone and humming along with a song on the radio this morning. "Nobody knows the trouble I've seen," I warbled.

Marianne looked up from her desk. "Nobody knows the trouble you are," she snorted.

Moi? Whatever could she mean?

"Look, Parker," she said. "Kibble doesn't grow on trees. You know I love you, but you have no idea how much money and time I spend on you, do you?"

Well, no. But really, how much time and money can feeding me a few kibbles every day take?

Turns out puppy raisers do a lot more than just fill the food dish every day. Marianne told me they provide all our food, treats, toys, vet care (ugh -- shots!), and equipment, like crates, dog beds, exercise pens, collars and leashes.

In addition, they foot the bills to get me to Denver from California when I'm 8 weeks old, and take me back to California when it's time for college. Marianne jokes that at least I have a full-ride scholarship once I get to CCI University.

And yikes, the paperwork she has to do! Puppy raisers have to complete reports every month for the pups that tell CCI our weight, what we eat (Iams Large Breed Smart Puppy for me!) and how much per day, any health issues, what commands we are learning, where and when our puppy classes were held, where we went and what we did each day, and all kinds of behavioral information. Man, let me tell you, there are no secrets at CCI.

Puppy raisers groom us, take us to classes, socialize us in all kinds of public places, and teach us CCI commands.

Puppy raisers also teach us what NOT to do. This week, for instance, I learned that chewing on my cape is a no-no, chasing the cat is a bad idea, and repeatedly flipping over my water dish earns me a time out in my crate. I was ready for a nap anyhow.

So, I guess this puppy raiser stuff is more complicated than I thought. Marianne says when the 18 months are up, she'll have invested around 12,000 hours and $2000 in me.

Wow. Good thing she loves me, huh?

Chow for now!

Parker

Check out the 12th annual Greenwood Village Goosechase fundraiser this Saturday! One of the charities that benefits is Sidekicks for Sight, puppy raisers for Guide Dogs for the Blind. I got to meet two pups in training, Leonard and Condor, today at the station. They were way cool! Go to www.goosechase.org for details.

Questions or comments for Parker? Send them to call7forhelp@thedenverchannel.com.